December 28, 2008

The Little Sparrow

Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who
decided not to fly south for the winter. However, soon the
weather turned so cold that he reluctantly decided to head
south. In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and
he fell to earth in a barnyard, almost frozen.

A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow. The sparrow
thought it was the end. But the manure warmed him and defrosted
his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing.

Just then a large cat came by and investigated the sounds.
The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird and
promptly ate him.

The moral of the story:

1. Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy.
2. Everyone who gets you out of the crap is not necessarily
your friend.
3. And, if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your
mouth shut.

December 10, 2008

Best Quotes from Movies/Shows

"It's when you're so afraid of death that you begin to appreciate life" --- Norman Stansfield (Gary Oldman), Leon: The Professional

"After that my guess is that you will never hear from him again. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist. And like that... he is gone." -- The Usual Suspects

"If you can't embrace your imperfections, how can you embrace others'?" --- Nip/Tuck

"We just get the one life, you know. Just one. You can't live someone else's or think it's more important just because it's more dramatic. What happens matters. Maybe only to us but it matters." --- Ghost Town

"I ain't saying drugs are good. But when your past is past and your present sucks and your future holds nothing but broken promises and dead dreams, the drugs'll kill the pain. Listen up, America, you ain't ever gonna get rid of drugs until you cure pain." ---Augustus Hill, Oz

It feels like someone kicked you in the stomach, feels like your heart stopped beating, feels like that dream you know the one when you are falling and you want so desperately to wake up before you hit the ground but its all out of your control, you cant trust anything anymore, no one is who they say they are, your life is changed forever, and the only thing to come out of the whole ugly experience is no one will be able to break your heart like that again." -- The Women (2008)

"I use to think the worst feeling in life was being alone, it's not; it's being with people who make you feel alone." - World's Greatest Dad (2009)

It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard... is what makes it great. -- Tom Hanks, A League of Their Own

Everyone has their first date. And the object is to hide your flaws. And then you're in a relationship, and it's all about hiding your disappointment. And then once you're married it's about hiding your sins. -- Dollhouse

"Choosing not to believe in the devil won't protect you from him." - Father Lucas, The Rite

"When it comes to living, dying is the easy part" - Carnivale

December 8, 2008

Mixed Bag of Quotes 3

"All cruelty springs from weakness" --Seneca

"Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events.
Small minds discuss people." ---E.Roosevelt

"Unhappiness is not knowing what we want and
killing ourselves to get it." --- Don Herold

"There is in every true woman's heart a spark of
heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of
prosperity; but which kindles up, and beams and blazes in
the dark hour of adversity." --- Washington Irving

No man chooses evil because it is evil; he only mistakes
it for happiness. -- Mary Wollstonecraft

“A woman is like a tea bag, you can not tell how
strong she is until you put her in hot water.” --Nancy Reagan

"It is easier to forgive an enemy
than to forgive a friend." ---William Blake (1757-1827)