This is one of the funniest emails I've received in a while. Enjoy! :0)
HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and
point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Insist that your e mail address is: Xena-Warrior-Princess@... or Elvis-the-King@...
4. Every time someone asks you to do something ask if they want fries with that.
5. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
6. Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
7. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks.
Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
8. In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for sexual favors.'
9. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
10. Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness
level lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.
11. Don't use any punctuation
12. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
13. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
14. Sing along at the opera.
15. Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly
the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does.
(This is especially effective if your boss is of the opposite gender.)
16. Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what
you're doing. For example, "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the
bathroom, in stall #3".
17. Call the psychic hot line and don't say anything.
18. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
19. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won!, I won! Third time this week!"
20. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the
parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives; they're loose!"
21. Tell your boss, "It's not the voices in my head that
bother me; it's the voices in your head that do."
22. Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we
are going to have to let one of you go."
23. Every time you see a broom, yell "Honey, your mother is here!"
24. Pass along to others so they may enjoy a good laugh or smile! :)